Blogging from A – Z
Let me tell you about Gaby. For 16 years I have tried to like her, but I have not succeeded. I am working with her, 5 days a week.
Whether Gaby is greeting you in the morning or asking a question, she sounds stilted. She is slim and small, but her voice is loud and harsh. Her skin is pale and coarse, her hair short and brown. She is wearing glasses that make her watery green eyes seem huge. These eyes never seem kind, even when her words are.
There is a sharp wrinkle above her nose and when she is angry it gets deeper and deeper. Gaby is often angry. She has a tendency to be patronizing towards both her collegues and her clients. Clients feel overly controlled and complain that she is unfriendly and pressuring them. The other socialworkers complain that she tries to be the boss and telling everyone how they should do their job, or worse, pointing out mistakes to them.
I have worked with her for years and for years I have been listening to her complaining, that we bend the rules of our concept too often. That’s true. And it is working fine for us. Rules should be applied when they fit, but every now and again there are cases where creativity is asked for.Then rules can be a hindrance rather than a help and I at least feel it is ok to make exceptions. That Gaby is not willing to do. There were conflicts with her almost every week, and I did not miss her a single minute.
Another thing she drove me crazy with was her need to “exchange views”. It didn’t help to tell her, “Gaby, I really have to get back to this report now, as I have an appointment later”. Gaby would simply continue with her questions or finding just one more angle she had to tell me about. I am not sure whether she craves attention or whether it is her way to practice control. Maybe both.
Sometimes I feel sorry for her. I think she tries to be liked but she has not got the skills to evoke sympathy. I am doing my best to get on with her, and I succeed, but every now and then I am tired of all the conflicts she causes.